WHEN they got aboard the king
went for me, and shook me by
the collar, and says:
"Tryin' to
give us the slip, was ye, you
pup! Tired of our
company, hey?"
I says:
"No, your majesty,
we warn't -- PLEASE don't,
your majesty!"
"Quick, then,
and tell us what WAS your idea,
or I'll shake
the insides out o' you!"
"Honest, I'll
tell you everything just as
it happened, your majesty.
The man that had a-holt of me
was very good to me, and kept
saying he had a boy about as
big as me that died last year,
and he was sorry to see a boy
in such a dangerous fix; and
when they was all took by surprise
by finding the gold, and made
a rush for the coffin, he lets
go of me and whispers, 'Heel
it now, or they'll hang ye, sure!'
and I lit out. It didn't seem
no good for ME to stay -- I couldn't
do nothing, and I didn't want
to be hung if I could get away.
So I never stopped running till
I found the canoe; and when I
got here I told Jim to hurry,
or they'd catch me and hang me
yet, and said I was afeard you
and the duke wasn't alive now,
and I was awful sorry, and so
was Jim, and was awful glad when
we see you coming; you may ask
Jim if I didn't."
Jim said it
was so; and the king told him
to shut up, and
said, "Oh, yes, it's MIGHTY likely!" and
shook me up again, and said he
reckoned he'd drownd me. But
the duke says:
"Leggo the
boy, you old idiot! Would YOU
a done any different?
Did you inquire around for HIM
when you got loose? I don't remember
it."
So the king let go of me, and
begun to cuss that town and everybody
in it. But the duke says:
"You better
a blame' sight give YOURSELF
a good cussing,
for you're the one that's entitled
to it most. You hain't done a
thing from the start that had
any sense in it, except coming
out so cool and cheeky with that
imaginary blue-arrow mark. That
WAS bright -- it was right down
bully; and it was the thing that
saved us. For if it hadn't been
for that they'd a jailed us till
them Englishmen's baggage come
-- and then -- the penitentiary,
you bet! But that trick took
'em to the graveyard, and the
gold done us a still bigger kindness;
for if the excited fools hadn't
let go all holts and made that
rush to get a look we'd a slept
in our cravats to-night -- cravats
warranted to WEAR, too -- longer
than WE'D need 'em."
They was still a minute --
thinking; then the king says,
kind of absent-minded like:
"Mf! And we
reckoned the NIGGERS stole
it!"
That made me squirm!
"Yes," says the duke, kinder
slow and deliberate and sarcastic, "WE
did."
After about a half a minute
the king drawls out:
"Leastways,
I did."
The duke says, the same way:
"On the contrary,
I did."
The king kind of ruffles up,
and says:
"Looky here,
Bilgewater, what'r you referrin'
to?"
The duke says, pretty brisk:
"When it comes
to that, maybe you'll let me
ask, what was YOU
referring to?"
"Shucks!" says the king, very
sarcastic; "but I don't know
-- maybe you was asleep, and
didn't know what you was about."
The duke bristles up now, and
says:
"Oh, let UP
on this cussed nonsense; do
you take me for
a blame' fool? Don't you reckon
I know who hid that money in
that coffin?"
"YES, sir!
I know you DO know, because
you done it yourself!"
"It's a lie!" --
and the duke went for him.
The king sings
out:
"Take y'r hands
off! -- leggo my throat! --
I take it all back!"
The duke says:
"Well, you
just own up, first, that you
DID hide that money
there, intending to give me the
slip one of these days, and come
back and dig it up, and have
it all to yourself."
"Wait jest
a minute, duke -- answer me
this one question,
honest and fair; if you didn't
put the money there, say it,
and I'll b'lieve you, and take
back everything I said."
"You old scoundrel,
I didn't, and you know I didn't.
There,
now!"
"Well, then,
I b'lieve you. But answer me
only jest this
one more -- now DON'T git mad;
didn't you have it in your mind
to hook the money and hide it?"
The duke never said nothing
for a little bit; then he says:
"Well, I don't
care if I DID, I didn't DO
it, anyway. But you
not only had it in mind to do
it, but you DONE it."
"I wisht I
never die if I done it, duke,
and that's honest.
I won't say I warn't goin' to
do it, because I WAS; but you
-- I mean somebody -- got in
ahead o' me."
"It's a lie!
You done it, and you got to
SAY you done it, or
--"
The king began to gurgle, and
then he gasps out:
"'Nough! --
I OWN UP!"
I was very glad to hear him
say that; it made me feel much
more easier than what I was feeling
before. So the duke took his
hands off and says:
"If you ever
deny it again I'll drown you.
It's WELL for
you to set there and blubber
like a baby -- it's fitten for
you, after the way you've acted.
I never see such an old ostrich
for wanting to gobble everything
-- and I a-trusting you all the
time, like you was my own father.
You ought to been ashamed of
yourself to stand by and hear
it saddled on to a lot of poor
niggers, and you never say a
word for 'em. It makes me feel
ridiculous to think I was soft
enough to BELIEVE that rubbage.
Cuss you, I can see now why you
was so anxious to make up the
deffisit -- you wanted to get
what money I'd got out of the
Nonesuch and one thing or another,
and scoop it ALL!"
The king says, timid, and still
a-snuffling:
"Why, duke,
it was you that said make up
the deffisit; it
warn't me."
"Dry up! I don't want to hear
no more out of you!" says the
duke. "And NOW you see what you
GOT by it. They've got all their
own money back, and all of OURN
but a shekel or two BESIDES.
G'long to bed, and don't you
deffersit ME no more deffersits,
long 's YOU live!"
So the king sneaked into the
wigwam and took to his bottle
for comfort, and before long
the duke tackled HIS bottle;
and so in about a half an hour
they was as thick as thieves
again, and the tighter they got
the lovinger they got, and went
off a-snoring in each other's
arms. They both got powerful
mellow, but I noticed the king
didn't get mellow enough to forget
to remember to not deny about
hiding the money-bag again. That
made me feel easy and satisfied.
Of course when they got to snoring
we had a long gabble, and I told
Jim everything.
|